Am I Available?

I ordered a book the other day. To keep it cheap, I of course ordered it used from a website that I have trusted before. When it arrived, it appeared to be the book that I purchased, but when I opened it, it was much more.

You see, it had writings and questions from the previous owner filling up several of the pages. Statements and thoughts were underlined because they struck the heart of this woman. Her deepest thoughts and questions revealed and yet I don't know her.

As I continued reading, asking questions, and evaluating my own heart, I came to a section where she was honest with where her heart was. She was being honest with her perception of love.

Her entry (07.31.09) - Love: It's been "convenient" and conditionally expressed. It's been limited by what's comfortable by me and/or the other. I don't know how to give or know how to receive love any other way. How can I truly give and receive Love?

I don't know what conclusions she came to or what she decided, but this honest truth from a complete stranger really got me thinking about "availability".

Love requires availability.

Whether it be being available to the guidance of the Spirit, praising GOD for HIS goodness, to sitting with a spouse as he/she explains their day, answering one of the many questions children have, cooking a meal for a family, listening to a friend, getting that cup of coffee for someone who you know would like to have one, speaking that word of encouragement, to helping the woman down the street you see struggling to carry her bags, etc... am I available? are you available? How easy we can crowd our days with tasks and our own agendas that we miss the person right next to us.

I want my life to be a life of service and Love. I am available.

When Home Becomes a New Community

I left for a year and a half on a journey of experiences, of challenges, of meeting new people, of venturing to new places, of opening up to new thoughts, of breaking down walls, of building strong foundations, of vulnerability, of strength, of relationship. And my journey continues at home for a bit.

You see when I left, I left a place that was familiar and now have returned to a place that is different and new. I haven't and can't come back to a place that was, but have come to a place that is. Those here may not see the changes that have occurred over the years, the changes around them, or even the changes in themselves, but there is a difference.

And so I find myself facing this new community who too, is learning to embrace who I am. Like any other place, home too holds such joy and such challenges. To see the growth that has taken place in the heart of my family and friends is breathtaking. And yet, to know that time once again is needed to get acquainted with each other is challenging. And so I choose to use this time to invest in them, to invest in all those around me.

I remain in contact with my previous communities and embrace my new community. With each coffee time, dinner, get together, concert, ball game, lake party, bonfire, road trip, and just evenings together...we grow closer, we encourage and challenge one another, and our relationships grow deeper.

I'm home.

Go and Do It.

Nathan told David, "Whatever is on your heart, go and do it; God is with you."
~1 Chronicles 17:2,

"Go and do it."

I look back at the times that I hesitated, waiting on GOD to move me, to make it clear. I remember the times I doubted. I questioned. I waited. Did I really grasp that Christ is in me? Did I understand what that really meant?

And now, I realize, I understand, that when my heart is right, focused on HIM, then the passions and desires that are in my heart are of HIM and HE doesn't say, "wait", but leads me to go and do it, for HE is with me.

When once I was inhibited by my past, by fears, by challenges I felt were too big to accomplish, by any excuse why something wouldn't work out, I now am filled with the HOPE of what can be, what will be.

Are there still challenges? Of course. And honestly, some are bigger than I imagined. But I don't doubt that I am to continue pressing forward, living without excuses, trusting that as I continue on, no matter what, I will not be deterred for when my heart is in the right place, I am living as I was created to live. I am to go and do it. I will go and do it.

I have been absolutely blessed to have been taught, challenged, loved, and supported by leadership, by family, that lives this way, daily. There isn't the continuous doubt, "Is this the will of GOD?", because they grasp and live out the understanding that we are the will of GOD.

In one week I return home. Yet, I am not going home to wait or put off what I know I am to do. But I am going home to continue living, loving, serving, discipling, preparing... for this lifestyle is and will be foundational for future generations.

Go and DO IT!

It's Personal!

"Whatever else anything is, it ought to begin by being personal."
-You've Got Mail

I know we all have heard the phrase, "It's not personal". I definitely have experienced times where we have tried to remove the personal aspects from interaction with each other whether in business environments, social scenes, or just the day to day activities.

I saw a five year old street boy the other day. He walked down the street, weaving between people, who didn't even give him a glance... "It wasn't personal." In other words, it was nothing against him, it is just the way it is, it has become the norm.

And I begin to wonder, what is wrong with being personal? I thought about how it all begins with being personal. It IS personal. I can go through life, getting an education, working, going to church, starting a family, etc. All great moments and all great things, but am I giving the best of me, or seeing the best in others around me. Is it personal? I can learn the greatest thoughts and ideas from others. I can hear theories. I can observe and appreciate the actions of others or the way they live. But where does it go from there?

You see, life is personal, relationships are personal, and my faith is personal.

I remember that moment when it hit me, completely, that GOD truly knows me. HE sees me. HE Loves me. And continues to desire to be with me, to reveal Truth to me, to bless me. It IS personal! And it is the same for you. It is the same for all of us. It IS personal. and from there the way we live is personal.

We see people; We give; We Love; We Live...Let's make this the norm!

It's Personal!

Pass-i-on

There are so many words I could use. There are many words spoken. Yet, I can't figure out specifically how to word my thoughts. I could spend this time listing out how I have grown and what I have learned here at G42. But it can't be contained in words. It is me. It is my heart. It is Life.

Simply put there is PASSION.

Like other words we are quick to generalize this term. But I see the depth in the word. To be so overwhelmed, filled, bursting with joy, desire, purpose that it can't be contained. To understand and grasp the joy of being Loved that it overflows from you, where you are not deterred no matter the challenges. It isn't something that can be contained, but must be released, shared with others, covering others, serving others, loving others. It is Life.

And in that moment when action takes place, when it bursts out of you in genuine gratefulness, does passion move from just being another word thrown around here and there, or something we hope to get someday.... but it transitions to reality, action, Truth. It becomes who you are!!!


You are a man of passion. And it is a passion that is contagious, encouraging, hopeful. You are a man of possibilities and opportunities, not challenges. You are a man of Love and Grace, not judgement or pride. You are a man who must act to express the passion running through you. To give of yourself generously to others without expectation. You are a man who is true to your word because you are more than words, but a man of action. You don't wait to serve others, to speak words of encouragement, to listen, to Love, because it is impossible to contain.

You are a man who can say, I
PASS what I have ON others.
PASS who I am ON others.
PASS the life I live ON others.
PASS-I-ON
Speak. Dance. Laugh. Serve. Give. Love. And may your passion rub off on all those around you.

How Long Will the Cycle Continue?

Children roam the streets near the port. A bench, a street curb, a small hideaway on the sidewalk is their home. Their childhood playtime, their young and passionate dreams, and their freedom are replaced with begging; They are replaced with drugs; They are even replaced with attempt after attempt of escaping to a nearby country.

It is common to see young hands stretched out. Yet, it is not to take the hand of his mother or father, but rather to ask for any spare change you may have. The sound of children's voices is not always the sound of friends bonding over laughter and the sharing of future ambitions, but rather a discussion on where they will sleep that night.

These children are losing hope. They are losing hope in society, in their country, and in themselves. Many are looking for ways to improve their lives. Yet, many feel the way to accomplish that is to escape to a nearby country. This is referred to as “burns” and will be attempted as many times as it takes to be successful. The cost to be smuggled by sea is 1,000 euros. Begging, gambling, stealing, are the means to acquire the payment, which is assumed will lead to a better life and is rationalized by survival. But even the dream of freedom in another country is quickly shattered with abuse from police, inadequate child protection services, or immediate deportation.

And the cycle continues...

I've absolutely had enough. Children continually trying to find refuge, life, in the streets. I can't help but think of my niece Grace, and my nephew Tyler praising GOD they are in a loving home, cared for, nurtured, and encouraged in absolute Love. And I desire to be a refuge for those in need of just that. That they will no longer be lost, but be seen. This vision will take investment, time, and the building of many relationships, but it will happen.

The cycle will be broken, and their dreams, their hope, their identity be restored.

Begin to See.

Oh if I could just meet with each one of you to share my heart, the vision I have to serve, disciple, care for street children, how I would love to share this with you. Though that one on one, face to face contact is not possible at this moment, I will continue figuring out how to express this vision with the means that I have... And greatly look forward to the time we will have when I return to share my heart with you.

I have much to write you, but I do not want to do so with pen and ink. I hope to see you soon, and we will talk face to face... ~ 3 John 13-14

As this vision develops, my heart comes alive, not to just become aware, but to do something.

So I share this brief video I created with you. It is a quick glimpse into my heart, but how there is so much more... for there is a plan as I am directed by GOD. Action will take place. Action is taking place. And I will describe more soon. Until then, begin to see the need...

We worry about what a child will become tomorrow, yet we forget he is someone today. ~Stacia Tauscher